Christmas Nuts

Minimalist Christmas decorations keep the season sane.

Minimalist Christmas decorations keep the season sane.


Christmas Nuts

It’s December and process serving get’s complicated this time of year. People get out to shop and visit others which means they aren’t home to answer the door for the likes of me. It gets even more complicated for me. You see, I am a Christmas Nut.

I adore Christmas, but that is probably because I have figured out how to do it without driving myself over the edge. First, start shopping in August and finish by the last week of November. Don’t buy gifts for everyone and their brother. Don’t spend more than twenty-five dollars on anyone. When having a party, make up a selection of cookies early in the season, throw some stew and chili in a couple crock pots and be done with it.

Spend the month of December being happy and making your home look festive. Also, listen to Christmas songs and only Christmas songs from Thanksgiving night to Christmas Day. Everyday, all day. This is where the ‘nut’ comes into Christmas Nut.

I can hear you groaning and I know why. You have had the same twenty Christmas songs inflicted on you from mid-November through Christmas. I once heard “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus” twice during a one hour shopping trip to Target. I hate “I Saw Mommy…”!

Do a search for Christmas songs and you will find the same twenty to thirty songs on every Christmas CD from Frank Sanatra to Twisted Sister. “Jingle Bells”, “Silent Night”, “Let it Snow”, “Winter Wonderland”, “Away in a Manger”, “White Christmas”, “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus”, “Frosty the Snowman”, “Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer”, etc, etc, etc. It is almost always some horrible recording done over poor quality speakers, so I can understand your aversion to them.

I have over eight hours of Christmas music on my computer and those songs pop up. Not as often as you would think, though. I only have three versions of Silent night and two of them are instrumentals. I combat the repetitiveness by finding new versions of the traditional songs and songs that don’t make it into the mainstream for some reason. I have been know to buy a Christmas CD for one song by a particular artist and considered it a good purchase.

I am selective with the songs that make the cut as well. Kenny Roger’s “Silent Night” didn’t make it, but Mariah Carey’s did. Some songs will never make the cut no matter who sings it. “O’ Christmas Tree” or “O’ Tannenbaum” by any name is a crappy song. For the same reason “Little Drummer Boy” seldom makes the cut either. And you can just forget “Grandma Got Run Over”. That one annoys me just thinking about it.

There are hundreds of Christmas Songs that are worth listening to, but for some reason, mass marketing has limited our selections, tainted our perceptions, and force fed us a diet of crappy Christmas music geared toward imbeciles and zombies. Christmas has enough man made stresses associated with it, music should not be one of them.

The next time you are burning out on Christmas songs, check out some of my favorites.

Once Upon a Christmas by Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton (hands down, favorite Christmas CD)
Glee: The Music, The Christmas Album
Greatest Christmas Collection: Pop by Various Artists (Two CD Set. The other is traditional)
Elf: the Soundtrack by Various Artists
Santa Claus is Coming to Town by the Peter Pan Carolers (Only available on vinyl and YouTube)
The Day Before the Night Before Christmas by the Caroleers (Only available on vinyl and YouTube)

The last two are kid’s Christmas music that was only released in the north-east for some reason and they are old, so most people have never heard them.

For a laugh and a twist on good music, check out the a capella group Straight-No Chaser.

My favorite individual songs are:

“A Christmas to Remember” by Dolly and Kenny
“Santa Baby” by Leon Redbone and Zoe Daschanel
“We Need a Little Christmas” by the Glee cast
“Merry Christmas, Darling” by The Carpenters
“For Christ’s Sake” by George Strait
“Mary Did You Know” by Clay Aikin
“It’s the Day Before the Night Before Christmas” by the Caroleers

I hope these songs will help you join me in being a Christmas Nut. Next time, I’ll talk about the ‘Christmas’ Songs that aren’t about Christmas at all.

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah and may your new year be glorious!